But...

I will rise again from the ashes,

I will love again, I know,

I’ll regain the hope that I’ve lost,

Although now I feel so low.

You can’t stop me, no matter what you say,

Your arguments are weak,

Because my faith is strong,

And I believe I’m able to move on.

Yes, I’m naïve, but I am not a fool,

I will not waste my time on you,

You’re stupid if you think that I will ever take you back,

Don’t underestimate my rules.

(Originally, maybe February 2011)

My Freedom (English version of the poem "Свобода" of December 27, 2010)

I am not needed in this world

And I will be a part of it no more.

It’s no use knocking on the heaven’s door,

No bringing back the happiness that’s lost.

I won’t get to see the sun again,

Won’t get to know that life is great,

I only know, there is no other way,

No point in putting off the Judgment Day.

All that remains is just a shade of hope,

Just cruel and obsessive memories,

Which take me back to that day long gone,

I can’t put right what's been done wrong.

Days come and go, I don't deny,

So why repeat the past mistakes?

Why keep the score of my defeats,

Trying to live without your smile?

Seems like it’ll always be this way,

Alas, it’s a delusion too.

My soul’s a mess, with vacant stare,

My faith fades out day after day.

We find the meaning in the empty things,

We hide behind a mask of vanity.

Life slips away, not giving any chance

To tell you just how much you mean to me.

And still I know that freedom I can find

If I can chase regrets and fears away.

And I will whisper just before I die,

“Forgive me”… But forgiveness I won’t gain.